3ve’s blog…duh!

Heyo…i’m here to talk bout something if not all ppl could relate to…driving. Ok o k…i know it’s weird…but i jus feel lik writing bout it. Can u calculate the time u spend in ur car? Every single day?

I dun know bout u guys…here some of the things i think relates to me while i am driving…now…drivers, dun u jus hate to drive sometimes? I mean…when u first got ur license…well, some cant wait to get on the road…some are still scared to get on the road…and some…well, have al’d been on the road..(for a few years al’d) but after some while, i think how we started off boils down to one conclusion…we hope we dun hav to drive more than we wished we do. It gets boring…come on! There’s tonnes of things to worry bout when u drive. B4 u get out of he house…u turn on the engine, hoping it will start smoothly, while waiting for it to warm up…u stare at the oil meter and sigh when u see it’s less than wat u hope for. Then, u start backing up and wonder whether u will be late or not becoz of the trafic tat u r definately sure will be there. When u wanna turn out, u fear that some guy from the other sid eof the road would jus speed and not look before he turn. U r a bit frustrated bout the auntie tat is driving in front of u…but u r too nice to horn…then u r caution of the motorcyclist who thinks tat his motorcycle is sturdier than ur car. And u do get stuck in the traffic jam…with the car next to u refusing to let u pass…or he is squeezing into ur space. U get a bit angered but u reminded urself not to curse becoz God is watching thus…it’s not right in the sight of God…so all u do is suck in all back in and turn on the radio…then the traffic starts moving and u think it’s over…moving down the smooth highway…u know u shud follow the speed limit…and u r at the max speed limit…though u r at the middle lane, the car behind u seem to have a fondness to ur back bumper…either u speed up, or u move to left. By speeding up, u fear that the surveilance camera is watching u…not to mention the hungry police during Raya. By moving to the left, u find urself behind the slow auntie again…choices choices. Finally, u turn in and reach ur destination. Now, where shud i park? Some where cheap wit parking and a nice shade. But places like these doesnt happen unless u r driving at 3am in the morning in the right place. So, which will u choose? Round bout 3 times…get urself a parking finally…pay ur parking ticket which depends how long u will be there..then walk 5 minutes to ur destination. Oh…did i mention under the blazing hot sun?

Of course after u have settled everything…u came back to check whether ur car hav been scratched, or summoned becoz u were a few minutes late for ur parking ticket…then u open ur car door and release all the afternoon heat out while u urself hav a lil sunbathing. Finally drop back into ur car and wonder u hav enuf petrol to reach home. Thinking whether u would be able to reach home safe and fast? or would u be stranded? Doing it all over again when tomoro comes…

While waiting on the traffic light…u realize…it’s a bit silent in the car…and u r getting bored. So, u turn on the radio…surf through available channels tat u hav on speed dial…when nth good comes on, u turn on the cd tat has been in there for the pass few days…and click to ur fav song. Then u sit back and relax a bit…thinking bout wat had happened during the day. Something bad has happened tat day and u know u shud do something botu it…but u jus cant put ur finger on it. Suddenly, u find urself caught in the music…watched and admire the shadows tat dance over ur seat and ur body. Singing to the song…whether loud or soft…it always sounds nicer when no one is listening. Not believing urself for wat u hav done during the day…u jus wanna find solitary. Some where safe…how amazing it is tat God found His way into ur heart when u jus take a break…even during the short time of waiting for the light to turn green. Then u drive on…watching the prussian blue sky…u realize, things arent tat bad. Though u know wat u hav done would never be erased…but u hav found comfort in Him who al’d knows the pain of the world. The One whose strength sustains us…whose love overwhelmed us…our Faithful Friend. Without realising it, u reached home. Relief and comforted. With a parking space only for u….

Hey…here i am again. i actually dun know wat i’m doing here. i jus feel like writing something..so if this gets really lame, feel free to bail. I’m us having funny feelings nowadays. U know? U get tat feeling u really wanted something, u work hard for it, U try ur best to achieve it and when u are finally stepping into ur dream, a day before. U sit there, on ur bed..and u wonder:" Ok, tomorrow’s the big day…" But somehow it doesnt excite u as how u think it would be. Further more, it actually turns into fear…and u wonder r u really cut out for this. Kinda kills the mood huh?

Well, guys, i think most of u know bout the dare to dream thingy by now. And to be honest, i dun think i’ll be able to achieve my dreams…not as how i potrayed it in TV anyways. I’ve been waiting and waiting for this dream to be a reality, really, believe me, i’ve done everythign i could. And i’m darn frustrated bout it. I could simply say tat it’s unfair to me. But i guess tat doesnt change anything huh? Now tat i’m standing at the crossroad again, the road tat i tot once held my future seems to hold disappointment now. I looked and looked, hoping and praying it will be open to me. But now i can dimly see it’s unwelcoming path. Then as u struggle to face tat path, doubts seems to creep into mind. I’m starting to think…i’m not cut out for this. Suddenly the lights got cut off and u r left in the dark. Of course, many are around…ppl, searching for the same thing and yet finding nothing tat offers hope. We keep our heads tall as long as we can. Stretching our necks as far as we can…some given up…some still stubbornly foraging. I admire those who still have a great fire burning in them, moving them forward…yet, the fire in me seem to burn more brightly in time pass. Some are here to stay, some are jus passing by. But everyone has to come to a crossroad. While still sitting on the bed…i guess we jus shake our heads, crawl underneath our blankets,shut our fresh eyes and try to fall asleep…as tomorrow holds our future uncertain…and we need every drop of energy to pull through it before we meet our beds again.